


Random ass oneshots I'm unlikely to ever follow up on

by Tigerdog25



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: F/F, F/M, Gayness, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Multi, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Squips (Be More Chill), Treebros, sincerely three
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:41:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26185837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tigerdog25/pseuds/Tigerdog25
Summary: Mostly musicalsA few don't make complete sense without context, I'll try and supply the information I can in the notes though(Some of them are a little old)Also, if you wanna talk to me about any of the au's in here, my Tumblr is Tigerdog25
Relationships: Alana Beck/Zoe Murphy, Evan Hansen/Connor Murphy, Evan Hansen/Jared Kleinman, Evan Hansen/Jared Kleinman/Connor Murphy
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	1. Jared's sleeping on the couch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this one, there at like some sort of beach house or something. And Jared's sleeping on the couch

Evan crept through the dark living room “Connor?”

“Couldn’t sleep either huh?”

Evan jumped roughly three feet in the air and turned around to see Jared sitting on the couch, arms crossed like a parent who had just caught there kid sneaking back into the house in the middle of the night

**_You moron! How the fuck did you just forget he’s sleeping out here?!_ ** Evan’s head screamed at him

“Nooooo it’s just...very hot in my room”

“Is it cooler in Connor’s room?”

“What?! No uhhh si-silly me! I was looking for the bathroom”

Jared fell off the couch “Evan, I damn near just had a heart attack and died from how stupid that lie sounded. Just go fuck Connor already”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plz comment


	2. Dream-Creature Connor Is Gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in this one Zoe & Connor are some sort of...dream creatures? (I know, I'm the BEST at naming things) and Evan's caught Connor's attention because He's ga-I mean his dreams are very realistic, yeah, that's it. Nothing gay going on here

“What the hell are we doing here?” Zoe asked trailing behind her brother through the void.

“Walking to are destination” Connor replied.

“I already hate this”

“I don’t”

“Can’t you just tell me what we’re doing?”

“I could. But why would I?”

“Because you’re involving me in it”

“I’m showing it to you, you aren’t getting involved in shit”

“Did someone’s grandma get ran over are something?”

“Not that I know of”

“Then what the fuck was able to catch  _ your _ interest?”

“Why don’t I show you?”

“Are we here?”

“Yuppers”

Zoe watched as the emptiness below her brother’s feet began to grow grass and spread like a ripple of greenery across a lake of nothing. Meanwhile, the smoke emanating of Connor’s joint began to form into clouds and trees began to stretch out from the grass that continued to spread until it was out of sight.

Rain began to fall as Zoe took in her surroundings “You wanted to show me a forest?”

“You could say that” Connor said picking up a leaf and watching it fold in on itself and open to reveal a flower that Zoe was 90% certain was a rose.

“Wait, is this-is this a dream?!” Zoe asked.

“Yep”

Zoe looked at the realisticness of the water falling on the leaves of the trees and onto the grass beneath them “How?!”

“Well-”

“Hello?” a voice called nearby.

“Shit!” Connor shoved Zoe behind one of the trees covering her mouth.

“Is-Is someone here?” the voice sounded like it was only a few feet away from them now.

Connor cautiously removed his hand off Zoe’s mouth and upon seeing that she wasn’t going to do anything climbed up the tree, Zoe following after him.

Zoe looked to see a boy that looked around their age through the leaves that appeared to be the source of the voice they heard earlier.

“Who’s that?” Zoe whispered.

“Evan”

“Is he what you wanted to show me?”

“Yeah”

“Why?”

“Look at him. He’s amazing”

“That’s pretty gay Connor”

“Shut up”

  
“So are you gonna talk to him or are you just gonna sit here spying on him?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plz comment


	3. Vallankumous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So in this one the world's more are less controlled by squips. There's a revolution happening in the shadows however, lead by Connor, Evan, and Jared. You'll just have to guess who Zoe's talking to here though

“Does it comfort you? Knowing your story will live on for decades, centuries even?”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

_He’s right there, kill him!_

“You’re about to kill the leader of the Vallankumous, your society will praise you for years on end...and mine will shun you, hate you. But they won’t kill you, I’ve told them they can’t. I’ve told them that we aren’t going to kill someone who doesn’t know any better. They’ll respect that, and they’ll live on. Continue what I started. Because no matter how much you celebrate, no matter how much those people will cheer for you or award you, no matter who you kill, or what you do, there will always be someone who doesn’t agree with the way things are. There will always be someone who thinks to themself that we could do better. And even if the Vallankumous dies then a new one will start”

_Enough of this crap! He’s stalling! KILL HIM ZOE MURPHY!!!_

“Cut the crap, bastard”

“Can I have a last question?”

_NO!!! KILL HIM!!!_

“Whatever”

“Will it bring you comfort knowing you killed me?”

“Will it bring me comfort knowing I killed the leader of an uprising of crazed lunatics? Absolutely”

“No, there will always be another leader, will it bring you comfort knowing you killed **_ME_ **?”

_Zoe Murphy, you will be reported if you do not kill him_

“...Why the fuck does it matter?”

“You said I could have a last question”

“Well I don’t fucking know! Alright!”

“Hmm...nice way to die, to a person who doesn’t even know if they want me dead”

“Shut up!”

“Well, I’m ready. Are you?”

_Zoe Murphy, your hesitating. Shoot him this instant or you will be deemed a traitor and dealt with accordingly_

“Why couldn’t you just let me have this?!”

“I’ve found that honesty is a valuable thing”

“Have you? Well that’s just amazing, real fucking touching”

“Listen I’m just trying to make my death seem cooler then it really is”

“I would think it was ‘ _cool’_ as it was”

“Eh, you’d be surprised by what minor details can change”

“What does that mean?”

“Oh, it doesn’t matter…”

Silence, the two simply stared at each other for what felt like hours. Zoe’s Squip had gone mysteriously quiet, it occurred to her that she was probably labeled as a traitor now. Fucking bastard

“did you enjoy jazz band or did you just do it because the computers told you to?”

“What? How the hell do you know about that? Why is that worth even bringing up?”

“I was just curious, thought I should ask before I died”

“Right, that...give me one good reason why I shouldn’t shoot you”

“Your on the wrong side perhaps?”

“That’s not a good reason”

“No, it is. You just don’t like it”

Zoe sighed “You’re insufferable”

“I try”

“So I suppose I should shoot you now”

“What happened to **‘I’ll fucking kill you if its the last thing I do’** and _‘ **I won’t damn hesitate when I catch you’** _ **?** ”

“An insane bastard said some creepy shit”

“Indeed he did...oh shit”

“What?”

And on that day, Zoe Murphy was shot through the head.


	4. Acorns And Smoke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this one, people who die sometimes turn into dogs.

**_'Life is pointless'_ ** Connor thought to himself as he lay in the back of the cage once again listening to the sound of Killer cry about fucking Veronica again while Princess screamed at him that she would “Break out of this fucking cage and tear your throat out if you don’t shut your ass up!”

He groaned as the sound of even more fucking dogs barking signaled that someone was coming in, whether that person was actually going to adopt someone or it was just one of the people who worked there was impossible to know. He doesn’t really care though. He hasn’t since Acorn got adopted.

Acorn, the one thing that had kept him from giving up on everything after both succeeding and failing at his suicide attempt. Acorn was quiet  _ unlike some animals _ but when he did talk he stuttered a lot (Connor wasn’t entirely sure how that worked but whatever) and seemed to second guess every single thing he said. Unless it was about trees. The kid fucking loved trees, Connor can still remember how passionate he sounded when he talked about them. How his eyes would light up and his-

Connor’s thoughts were interrupted by the door opening thus causing any dog in the room that hadn’t been barking to do so and all of the rest to lose there fucking shit. You’d think they hadn’t seen a human in a billion years are something.

“Smokey, there’s a human. Get up” Flower, the dog in the cage next to his said.

“Meh”

“Smokey” she sounded like a disappointed parent. She sounded like that pretty much every time she talked to him. Even as a dog he’s disappointing.

“A lot of the dogs back here are pretty weird Ms. Hansen. I wouldn’t really bother looking at them” is that fucking Kleinman? Connor felt his frustration growing. He hated that fucking kid. He was a little shit at school and was no different now.

He was the one who named both him and Acorn. Him because  _ “You look like the dog version of a stoner” _ which of course when asked about by someone he quickly made up so bullshit excuse, something about the spot on his right eye he thinks.

Meanwhile “ _ You found him under a tree? What is he? An acorn?” _ Connor wasn’t honestly entirely sure why they let him name any of the animals. Also later on Connor found out that Acorn had fucking jumped out of that tree so that was just lovely.

He fucking misses Acorn.

“Smokey come on, you can’t just lie there forever” Apparently Flower hadn’t yet given up despite his clear lack of giving a shit.

“Actually, I can, I’m doing it right now”

“Oh just let him rot Flower, it’s what he wants anyway” Princess said.

“For once we’re in agreement” Connor said before rolling over to face the wall “leave me alone”

He decided to try and sleep but only a few minutes after he drifted into unconsciousness he was awoken by a voice that sounded much closer then Kleinman’s had.

“Who’s this?”

“Hmm oh, the sto-I mean Smokey?” Stupid fucking Kleinman.

“Is he alright?”

“He’s fine, I don’t know what his problem is. He’s been like that all week”

**_‘Your concern for my well being is touching Kleinman’_ ** Connor thought.

“He seems sad”

**_‘Really? I thought I was the most chipper little dog that had ever existed_ ** ’

“I guess so”

“Can I adopt him?”

**_‘WHAT?!’_ ** Connor couldn’t honestly believe what he just heard.

“What!?” Apparently neither could Kleinman.

**Author's Note:**

> Plz comment


End file.
